tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
