Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Randomize
