so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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