Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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