Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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