I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
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