I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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