I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
