What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
