woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
