Say something about gay babies.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
