Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Randomize
