We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
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