I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
