i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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