So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
