Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Randomize
