i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
