i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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