North Korea, Best Korea!
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
