that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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