Yo dont text me then not text me
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize