I'm pants shitting drunk right now
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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