We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Randomize
