Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
