Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
Randomize
