She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
