she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
