I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
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