do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
