so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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