Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
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