you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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