Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Randomize
