Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
