Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
high people should be assigned attendants
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
