If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize
