MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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