She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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