One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize