1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
well I can't set my house on fire every night
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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