u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
