grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I just found puke in my bra..
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
