I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
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