Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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