i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize