Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Randomize
