Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
Randomize
