He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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