ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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